On My Way: Day One Saturday, February 18, 2012

Last night I slept more soundly than I have for years.  Was this a coincidence?  No, I think not. I tried to meditate this morning while in shul.  I was stuck on the woman’s side of the mehizza, not able to see anything happening on the torah side of the shul. I brought the reading materials Lee gave me yesterday and read through them while the others looked at their prayer books or chatted with each other, not seeming to care what was happening on the men’s side.  I did my deep breathing, then closed my eyes.  It seemed very appropriate to meditate in synagogue.  Why not?  In the end, it didn’t work out.  As I went through the relaxation phase, bringing my mind’s eye to relax each of my body parts, I could hear the congregation standing.  Who knows why?  I assume someone raised a torah.  There was no way to see it.  Not all of the women stood so I don’t know what the protocol was.  The interesting part for me was that I wasn’t upset at being relegated to the women’s side.  I was offended, yes, but not upset. The others around me were immersed in their world.  Their way of praying had nothing to do with the men’s world.  They read prayerbooks, obviously many were not on the same page as the men, or they chatted with each other (not always quietly), or they tended to children.  They had a parallel way to worship and they seemed just fine with that.

Later on, in the afternoon, at home, I tried again.  And, just as Lee said, I closed my eyes to begin at 3:00 and somehow or other, when I opened my eyes it was exactly 3:30pm.  Okay, Day One!