If you tell me you're deciding whether or not to divorce your husband, or you're struggling with your newly teenaged daughter, or you're looking for your best friend's murderer, chances are I'll tell you to try meditation. It's a bit like chicken soup (it might not help, but it won't hurt) and I do not mean to insult the power of chicken soup (more on that later). And even though I believe so strongly in the power of meditation and its ability to resolve issues that never even occurred to you, when it's time for me to sit down and meditate, I resist. It always seems more important to start the project I'm behind the eight ball on now rather than twenty minutes from now after I'm done meditating. Or I need to take the dog for a walk. Or I should really make that phone call I've been putting off for weeks. I know I need to meditate and I know I need to meditate on a daily basis. I know I am a more efficient and productive person when I meditate. I know I am less consumed with anxiety. I know. I know. I know. But it still is difficult to sit down and stop.
The easiest place for me to fit some meditation time into my schedule is when I find a half-hour or forty-five minute break in between commitments. I figure I can't get anything much else accomplished in that time anyway and I sandwich in a meditation session. It's only a pretense of productivity, but it works. The problem with this is that I don't find this break in my schedule on a daily basis. If I were the person I wished I were, I would meditate every day at the same time. Sigh. Even after all this meditation, I'm still me.