When all else fails, I go to evening minyan. We are a group of at least nine people and a Torah  (the Torah counts as a person) who gather at dusk to recite the evening prayers. The mourners say Kaddish; the rest of us respond Amen. Every line of Kaddish finishes angry, finishes sad, finishes strong. Technically this is because every line ends  with a beat. Mystically this is because the prayer is written in a language that has long been lost. It is an insistent repetition of meaninglessness  over and over.

Listening to the mourners speak the words is humbling. This is a prayer about mortality despite the fact there is no reference to death and it has been said for thousands of years in the most excruciating of situations. The saying of the words is life-affirming. The saying of the words is meditation.